Today, just after 6 am an army of Daleks attacked Great Bruton. By 6:30am they had breached the Dalek defences and arrived at Jubilee park. Luckily the park was quiet and nobody got exterminated although the local residents were left in a state of shock.
Henry van Statten, responsible for the design and construction of the Jubilee park Dalek defences, said “We recently updated one of the main paths to the park. After much consideration we decided we would leave the steps to ensure that no Daleks could get to the park. Clearly this means that pushchairs and wheelchairs cannot use the path and have to go on the roads (there are no pavements to the park). However, this was considered to be a minor safety issue compared to the risk of a Dalek attack!”.
However, the cunning Daleks observed that there was access along the road. Thankfully, five Daleks were crushed by a fast moving vehicle. Unfortunately the remaining Daleks gained access to the park where they exterminated a small horse and elephant. The Daleks caused havoc before a police box appeared and then they mysteriously disappeared.
Rose Tyler, an international Dalek expert, explained. “Clearly these Daleks have read that Bruton is one of the hippest places in the universe. Last year they arrived by train but thankfully could not cross over the footbridge.”.